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Numero Uno










  1. What are the little ways in which you stay connected by turning toward your spouse, or someone close to you? What impact do these little actions have on your relationship?
It is by doing the constant small things in marriage that make it great .  It may sound silly to some , but if my husband has paired socks and knows where to find his clean underwear then he is a happy man.  Happy not because I’m doing his chores but he is happy because he feels appreciated .  This may not work for everyone and everyone has different ways they feel appreciated and loved .  Also a snickers candy bar every other day helps too.
                                           
I think one of the ways I stay connected to my spouse is just by knowing him , continuing to get to know him every day . Life changes every day , different things at work happen , financial stress gets bigger and people change .  I’m constantly thinking “ oh wow I didn’t know that about you “ and then learning from it and making sure I remember when the situation comes up again . 
Staying connected is about spending time together it’s about letting the other person know we care and are there for them. 
Its listening to the stories they have about their day, putting down the phone and really connecting . I feel this is a struggle with all the technology and distractions around now .There are times I am talking with my husband and he is on his phone at the same time playing a game . This is a little frustrating to me and he knows it now and is working on it . 
Turning towards one another is having each other’s back .  When we are going through something we need to feel we can approach our spouse about it and even though they can’t always fix it for us, they are there to comfort and help us get through it. 
When we take our fear, joys, latest triumphs to someone else , there is a disconnection in the relationship, it took me along time to figure that out. My sister used to be my number one person who i would turn to for advice before i was married . However this was a hard habit to break when i was first got married. When i shouldve been turning to my husband i was still turning to my sister. I now know this hurt my husband , maybe hurt is not the right word I guess he just didn’t feel like he was my number one if I was confiding in other people .  The more you share with your spouse whether it be good or bad , the more you stay connected , how can you help someone if you dont know what they are going through. .

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Calvin Hollingsworth

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